Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Health Assessment


This afternoon, I have my first "health assessment" since I turned 65 and became a card-carrying, Medicare-covered old geezer. The good news is that I was able to get my old doctor back when I regained the health care coverage I lost when I retired back in April. The bad news is that the appointment probably won't be long enough to address the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to*.


I don't know what the doctor will have to say after he's reviewed all the test results and probed my nether regions, but if he comes back into the room wearing a hazmat suit I'll take it as a bad sign.

Have a good day. If you need a second opinion, ask Mr Trump - he'll tell you that the day is going to be terrible, and only he can fix it.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* Sorry, Hamlet.

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Just What the Doctor Ordered


I have an early appointment this morning to have our car serviced, so I'll just make this short ...


On second thought, make it a double.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Monday, November 28, 2016

Guest Post


Hi, there.


My name is Lucy. Bilbo and Agnes think of me as their grandcat. I live with their daughter's family and with Clara, the clueless canine that you've met here before.

I've noticed that Clara occasionally sneaks into Bilbo's study and writes stuff on this blog thing of his. She does occasionally have something passably interesting to say, but - being a dog - that's not very often, nor is it very deep. I thought it might be a good idea if you had a more nuanced feline perspective on things to balance out all the simplistic claptrap that Clara grinds out. Let's try it.

First of all, you need to understand that we cats are cool. We don't get all excited about short-term stuff*, we take the long view. I do a little day trading on the home computer while everyone is away at work and school, trying to build a strong portfolio for the future**, and - like all cats - I carefully watch what's going on around me without appearing to do so. This is how I knew that that distasteful Trump person was going to get elected, while Clara and most everybody else thought that the Clinton person would win. I'm sure glad I'm a cat and won't have to live with the ramifications of that, at least as long as taxes on Fancy Feast don't go up to pay for the tax cuts for rich humans***. Good luck with that.

Getting back to basic differences ... Clara races around and makes lots of noise about everything, while I prefer to rely on quiet surveillance and long-term planning. For instance, Clara makes sure everyone for blocks around knows when someone comes within a hundred yards of the house, but what does she ever do about it other than bark and run in circles? Me, I've got a file of detailed plans for ambushing people and animals that look potentially threatening, not to mention a cleverly-concealed observation post under the bushes by the front porch from which I can launch attacks when necessary to defend the homestead.

And although I bring offerings to my humans, I seldom get proper credit for it. You don't see them catching their own mice and leaving them artfully displayed in front of the bedroom door, do you?

In general, we cats tend to stay low-profile and move carefully through the ground clutter on the radar. We do, however, also plan for distractions that will steer humans away from discovering the truth about our evolving long-term plans for world domination ... for instance, the brilliant plan to flood the Internet with cute kitten videos and tens of thousands of Grumpy Cat memes. You'll never know what hit you ... sort of like how you'll feel after a few years of that Trump person as your alpha cat.

Okay, that's enough for now. I'll come back occasionally and offer feline observations on the world. In the meantime, just move on ... there's nothing to see here ...

Bilbo will be back tomorrow with more thoughts. Until then, I really don't care what kind of day you have, because I'm a cat. We're like that.

Meow.

Lucy

* Well, other than red dots from laser pointers.

** Catnip futures don't do as well as some other commodities in quarterly trading returns, but from a feline perspective they're a better investment for long-term growth.

** You thought I was going to say "fat cats," didn't you?

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Musical Sunday


I saw the wonderful Kenyan-born British singer Roger Whittaker in concert in Germany many years ago, and he sang this song in the show ... it's a poignant, beautiful tune that's long been one of my favorites.



Have a good day, and enjoy the rest of your weekend. More thoughts in the new week.

Bilbo

Saturday, November 26, 2016

Cartoon Saturday


Recovered from the Big Dinner yet?

Because we've still got the whole family visiting and time is short, the usual bad news summary will not appear this week. But if you're reading this blog, you have an internet connection anyway, and can find the bad news on your own.

I know Thanksgiving was the day before yesterday, but it's my blog and if I say we're doing Thanksgiving theme cartoons today, then that's what we'll do ...

Happy GOP Thanksgiving!


Fortuitous accident ...


The First Thanksgiving: the Untold Story ...


It works in reverse, too ...


Sometimes, a little prompt is needed ...


It's a tough time of year for neurotic turkeys ...


Survival planning ...


Someone call CSI: Thanksgiving ...


It must have been tough being a Puritan ...


There's been a leak at Farmer Bob's ... 

Have a good day and a great weekend! Come back tomorrow for Musical Sunday - more thoughts then.

Bilbo

Friday, November 25, 2016

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


Just in case you can rouse yourself from your turkey-induced coma, here's this week's collection of Great Moments in Editing and Signage ...

Well, it's an endorsement of sorts ...


Breakfast of Champions ...


I wonder if I can make it before they close ...


Who needs an emergency, anyhow? ...


I think it would depend on who the guest of honor is ...


Yes, I'd like a root beer with turkey gravy, please ...


Just another way cars are being made safer for all drivers ...


Why, those clever bastards ... 


Remember the pie!! ...


I think I'll go on Thursday ...


Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday - more thoughts then.

Bilbo

Thursday, November 24, 2016

Thanksgiving Day, 2016


As all of my regular readers already know, today is my favorite holiday: the traditional and quintessentially American holiday of Thanksgiving. In a crazy world in which we too often focus on fear and negativity*, and on the material things in life, it's good to have a day on which to sit back and reflect on the things for which we can be truly thankful. Today - as on every Thanksgiving Day - Bilbo the Cynical Curmudgeon yields the blog to Bilbo the Reflective Grandpa to think about some of the things that are right with the world ...

A beautiful and marvelously talented wife who makes life interesting and enjoyable ... if a little chaotic at times;

Three loving and successful children who have made their own marks on the world, and of whom I am proud beyond all measure;

Six adorable, intelligent, and loving grandchildren that can warm the most jaded heart;

The world's best daughter-in-law;

A new, fine son-in-law;

A comfortable retirement**;

A home***;

Good health;

Friends††;

The good fortune to be able to live in a country which, for all its faults, gives me the opportunity to enjoy all of the above;

The ability to write what I wish in this space without worrying about the heavy hand of the censor; and,

The ability to enjoy the good things of the world that would be denied by those whose harsh and intolerant worship of a jealous and angry God ignores the beauty and possibilities of the present in favor of rigid belief in an imagined paradise in an unknowable future.

I have many things to be thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day, and it's only proper that I should take a few minutes to acknowledge that I am, as ever, most richly blessed.

I wish all of you, Dear Readers, the very happiest and safest of holidays.

Have a good day. Give thanks for the good things you have and the bad things you don't. And stay out of the stores tomorrow ... you'll thank me.

More thoughts tomorrow, along with a new batch of Great Moments in Editing and Signage.

Bilbo

* Yes, Mr Trump and the GOP, I'm talking to you.

** So far, anyhow.

*** As long as we keep up the payments.

† Until the GOP guts Medicare, anyway.

†† Amazing, after the misery of the campaign season.


Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Taking a Short Break


Well, Dear Readers, we're just two days out from Thanksgiving, and those are going to be very busy days. There's a house to clean*, last-minute shopping to do, and food to be prepared in advance. I'm going to be a pretty busy guy**.

And so this will be my somewhat truncated post for today. I don't plan to post anything tomorrow, but the posts for Thanksgiving Day, the Friday Editorial and Signage Gems, Cartoon Saturday, and Musical Sunday are already written and scheduled to publish. I'll be back again with my normal ranting and raving on Monday the 28th.

Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving. If you're following me on Facebook, I'll have occasional commentary and pictures there.

See you on Monday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* One of my friends suggested just re-routing a small river through it, but that would make the job even more herculean.

** Forget raking the leaves. I'm not raking any more leaves. Three times already is enough. Anyhow, the latest revealed wisdom says to just leave them in place to protect and fertilize the lawn. I'm good with that.

Monday, November 21, 2016

Unfriending


If you spend much time on Facebook, you have probably seen this recent post that has been making the rounds -


Given the reaction by some of my friends to some of the things I've posted, and my reaction to some of the things some of my friends have posted, I thought it was brilliant, and promptly published it on my own FB page. I received a number of comments, many of which concerned the number of people that are now being "unfriended" because of irreconcilable political differences.

This is sad.

Within my circle of friends, I have conservatives, libertarians, liberals, gays, lesbians, Christians, Jews, Muslims, atheists, agnostics, immigrants (including the legal, taxpaying one to whom I'm married), Blacks, Whites, Asians, Hispanics, and all sorts of permutations and combinations thereof. So far, I haven't unfriended anyone because of their political views, religious beliefs, sexual orientations, or racial background. 

That's not to say that I won't unfriend anyone in the future. My general philosophy of life to like everybody until they give me some really good reason to not like them. What this means is that I have a lot of friends with whom I don't agree on all topics, but we get along anyhow. There are, of course, people I don't like - among them liberals, conservatives, libertarians, Blacks, Whites, Hispanics, Asians, Christians, Jews, Muslims, gays, lesbians, atheists, agnostics, and immigrants - but the reason I don't like them isn't because they're Black or White or Hispanic or Asian or liberal or conservative or libertarian or Christian or Jewish or Muslim or gay or lesbian or atheistic or agnostic or come from some other country - it's usually because they're either trying to force their beliefs on me or doing something that is blatantly illegal*. 

So here's the deal ...

I'm going to keep writing this blog and expressing my opinions, which is my right under the First Amendment to the Constitution**. You are free to read or not read, as you wish. I encourage you to argue with me, and to call me out if you think I'm wrong. This is a democracy, in which we share thoughts and viewpoints in the marketplace of ideas. If you think I'm wrong, though, I expect the courtesy of a counterargument that relies on genuine facts ... not ad hominem comments or snide remarks or allusions to unproven events or clickbait articles from Breitbart.com or an equivalent left-wing website. I expect a genuine effort to understand my point of view, as I'll try to understand yours. In today's superheated environment, it's unlikely that our respective opinions will change overnight, but at least we ought to be willing to consider the validity of different points of view based on evidence, and not on the political prism through which we view them.

If you can't do that, you may end up ... well ... unfriended ...



Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* Like coming to this country illegally and expecting everyone to think it's okay.

** Amazingly enough, there are rights guaranteed by amendments to the Constitution other than the Second.

Sunday, November 20, 2016

Poetry Sunday


Our new president-elect spent a whole lot of time during the endless campaign complaining bitterly that the only way he could lose was because everything was rigged against him. Of course, we now know how it all turned out ... he's got lots to say now, and none of it is about systems rigged against him. Of course, he'd now deny ever having said any of it. But the rest of us know the truth ...

Everybody Knows
Lyrics by Leonard Cohen

Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
Everybody knows that the war is over
Everybody knows the good guys lost
Everybody knows the fight was fixed
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that the boat is leaking
Everybody knows that the captain lied
Everybody got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died

Everybody talking to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long stem rose
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that you love me baby
Everybody knows that you really do
Everybody knows that you've been faithful
Give or take a night or two
Everybody knows you've been discreet
But there were so many people you just had to meet
Without your clothes
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

And everybody knows that it's now or never
Everybody knows that it's me or you
And everybody knows that you live forever
When you've done a line or two
Everybody knows the deal is rotten
Old Black Joe's still pickin' cotton
For your ribbons and your bows
And everybody knows

And everybody knows that the Plague is coming
Everybody knows that it's moving fast
Everybody knows that the naked man and woman
Are just a shining artifact of the past
Everybody knows the scene is dead
But there's gonna be a meter on your bed
That will disclose
What everybody knows

And everybody knows that you're in trouble
Everybody knows what you've been through
From the bloody cross on top of Calvary
To the beach of Malibu
Everybody knows it's coming apart
Take one last look at this Sacred Heart
Before it blows
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Oh everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows


A great song for this time. Sigh. Here's the video of Leonard Cohen singing it live.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Saturday, November 19, 2016

Cartoon Saturday


The clock is ticking toward the change of administrations ...

The government of Mexico is working on economic contingency plans to cope with trade agreement changes expected once the Trump administration takes office; Iraqi army forces fighting to liberate Mosul from Daesh occupation have discovered hundreds of bodies buried in mass graves; in a horrifying accident, a 23-year-old man fell into a hot spring at Yellowstone National Park and dissolved before he could be rescued; President-elect Trump has paid $25 million to settle a package of lawsuits over his failed "Trump University" project; and famed theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking has estimated that the human race has about 1,000 years to find a new planet to colonize before running the risk of a mass extinction*.

As Donald Trump and his advisors slowly plan the transition to his new administration, it seems appropriate to have a Cartoon Saturday dedicated to cartoons about politics ...

Many schools are having difficulty in explaining the election campaign to their students ...


Now that's a threat ...


The language you use in politics is very important ...


There's always somebody waiting to be offended, and it's not always who you think ...


I have a feeling that a lot of people are going to realize they've been fooled ...


Moonlighting ...


It's the only thing scarier than real climate change ...


Boxing in political terms ...


Speaking with all the authority of someone with a long-dormant degree in Linguistics, I think this is hilarious ...


A good question ...


Well, I hope this helped cheer you up. Heaven knows most of the country needs a little cheering-up.

It looks like it's going to be a chilly and rainy weekend here in NoVa, good weather to work on cleaning the house in preparation for the arrival of our family for the Thanksgiving reunion. Unfortunately, the weekend only lasts two days and my less-than-stellar day-to-day housekeeping skills argue for considerably longer. Oh, well ... as the old Amish adage says, a house should be clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy. I think I can manage that.

Have a good day and a great weekend, and come back tomorrow for Poetry Sunday. More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* There are those who think it may take less than 4 years.

Friday, November 18, 2016

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for November, 2016


The election is over, but the shouting and the lunacy go on. And why is this so? There are many reasons, but I think there is one that towers above the others at this moment in time.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Readers, I give you the

The Left-Cheek Ass Clown for November, 2016


The News Media:
Both "Mainstream" and "Alternate"


It's become standard to sneer at the "Mainstream Media" and accuse them* of bias** ... particularly on the conservative side, which has developed its own media structure with biases it prefers. And it's long been recognized that the rise of cable and satellite television and the Internet have created vast numbers of highly specialized sources of "news" specifically targeted at the political and religious beliefs and biases of narrow slices of the public. Taken together, these developments have destroyed the concept of informative and unbiased "news" as it used to be delivered by journalists like the great Walter Cronkite, and replaced it with an array of staunchly partisan echo chambers which provide not facts on which concerned citizens can base informed opinions, but carefully selected and parsed data which conforms to the preconceived ideas of their audiences.

And the traditional media has let it happen.

By encouraging false equivalence between beliefs and positions which clearly do not warrant it, by uncritically reporting every ridiculous tweet fired off by a man completely unqualified to be president, by failing to clearly expose and demand retraction of falsehoods, and by allowing itself to be distracted by the shiny objects of a wildly nontraditional campaign, the traditional - or "mainstream" media has allowed a festering swamp of misinformation, distortion, and outright lies to undermine our democratic institutions.

And the newer, "alternative" media, which replaces truth in reporting with blatant lies, distortions, and feel-good pablum that confirms the biases of their audiences, is equally to blame. It has led to a level of ignorance and poor citizenship that will poison our national discourse for a long time.

If you need help in identifying some of the more egregious online sources of misinformation, fake news, and misleading headlines, check here. If you're okay with drinking the Kool Aid of your chosen sources of news, regardless of how off-kilter they are, just go on believing everything you hear. Ignorance, as has long been known, is bliss.

In honor of its role in dumbing down the American electorate and undermining our institutions and our respect for truth and civil discourse,  The Media, both Traditional and Alternative, is named our Left Cheek Ass Clown for November, 2016. 

Have a good day. Come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday ... heaven knows we need the laughs.

More thoughts then.

Bilbo

* "Media" is plural. Many people don't know this, or care.

** Or, if you enjoy swilling the hyperbolic Kool Aid of Alex Jones at infowars.com, they're "a cult of racist mind control."

Thursday, November 17, 2016

Transitions


According to this morning's news, the incoming Trump administration's transition representatives have not yet made contact with anyone in the Pentagon. The president-elect has had phone calls with Chinese and Russian leaders, and will be sitting down today with the Prime Minister of Japan ... all without prior discussion of relevant issues with anyone in the State Department.

I'm not sure we're off to a good start. But then, why worry? After all, Mr Trump has already told us he knows more than anyone else, he's his own best advisor, and only he can fix all our problems.


Have a good day, and keep your fingers crossed. More thoughts tomorrow, when we name our Left-Cheek Ass Clown for November.

Bilbo

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Not Your President? Not So Fast.


At the end of a nasty, bitter, uncivil, and fact-challenged election, Donald Trump emerged victorious as our next president. He did not win the popular vote, although some on the right claim he did, but he clearly won the Constitutionally-prescribed process by which he amassed the commanding number of votes in the Electoral College. For good or for ill, the results of the popular vote are not legally or Constitutionally relevant.

Many people, myself included, strongly opposed Donald Trump for a variety of reasons. We weren't thrilled with Hillary Clinton as a candidate, but in an election in which most of us voted while holding our noses, she seemed to me to be the better of two unfortunate candidates.

Now that the election is over, demonstrations - indeed, riots - have broken out in various cities across the country as people who are horrified at the thought of a Trump presidency turn out with chants of "Not My President."

Well, folks, you're wrong.

Donald Trump is your president. You may not like him, but he won the election in full compliance with the Constitution. I agree that Mr Trump doesn't appear to understand the Constitution* and the responsibilities, limitations, and freedoms it prescribes, but nevertheless, he's the president-elect. The time has come to suck up our disappointment and, as President Obama reminded us, do everything we can to help make Donald Trump a successful president. This doesn't mean failing to strongly (and within the constitutional process) object to his policies** that are misguided. It does mean that we should give him the benefit of the doubt and hear him out.

Donald Trump is one of the most distasteful persons ever elected to the presidency. He advocated some things I could support, but many others I couldn't. He ran a campaign based on lies***, hatred, and fear-mongering, and I personally believe that he will be a disastrous president. But he's now my president-elect, and yours, too.

Let's calm down and help him where we can, and oppose him where we must.


Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* And I don't mean that he doesn't know how many articles there are in the Constitution. Hell, I don't think I could have told you that, either. I mean that he has, throughout the campaign, advocated measures that are blatantly unconstitutional and unamerican.

** To the extent he has any.

*** And please don't try to equate the huge number of pants-on-fire howlers Mr Trump refused to walk back, even when PROVEN to be wrong, with those told by Secretary Clinton. All politicians have at most a nodding acquaintance with the truth ... Mr Trump wouldn't recognize it if it bit him on the backside.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Beware!


Across the country, angry people are protesting - sometimes violently - the outcome of a distasteful and dispiriting, but perfectly legal, election. Hate crimes against Muslims and other minorities are on the rise. The president-elect has named a notoriously anti-Semitic and angry radio host as a principal advisor ... and has been congratulated by the KKK and the American Nazi Party for doing so. I don't care who let the dogs out ... who let the crazy people out?


Have a good day. Don't riot. Just grit your teeth and hope for the best ... but expect the worst.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Monday, November 14, 2016

Today's Annoyance: Cash Register Receipts


There's an issue that's been bothering me for a long time that I would like to bring to your attention.

I thought about this most recently when I went yesterday afternoon to the local Big Chain Supermarket to buy one item: a piece of meat for dinner. Amazingly and uncharacteristically enough, I went through the self-service checkout line* with my one item and received a receipt that measured 16-5/8 inches in length. Here's what that super-sized receipt contained:

Documentation of the sale (name and location of the store, store phone numbers, what I bought, price, date, taxes, type of payment, etc) - 7-3/8 inches, 1/2 inch of which told me that I had received "Bonus Buy Savings" for using my "Bonus Card" on the one item I'd bought.

A "Savings Summary" for using my "Bonus Card" - 1/2 inch.

A thank you statement for helping the store raise money for children's cancer research - 1-3/8 inches.

A statement of "Total 2016 Card Savings" - 1-3/8 inches.

A summary of the gas discounts I've earned by using my "Bonus Card" - 2 inches.

The last four digits of my customer number - 1/2 inch.

"Thanks for shopping with us" statement and store URL - 1-3/8 inches.

Trailer with repeated date and time of the sale, number of the sale, and ID of the checkout scanner - 1-3/4 inches.

Total length of receipt: 16-5/8 inches (totals may not be exact because of rounding).

Consider this: if that receipt had simply documented essential information (items purchased, price paid, date, and time), it could have measured about 8-5/8 inches ... half of the original length. How much paper is wasted every day in this one store by printing enormously long register receipts full of information we don't need or care about?

I realize that this may not rank high on the list of things that irritate many Americans. After all, many of our fellow countrymen are busy planning to move to Canada, cheering the diminishment of their freedoms of speech and the press and confirmation of their freedom of armament, or getting drunk on principle. I get that. Nevertheless, it bothers me.

And I probably won't to go to jail because I complained about it, even under the libel laws the new president wants to "open up."

Have a good day. Ask your supermarket how much they pay for all that cash register tape you're paying for.

More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

* And you know how much I love those.

Sunday, November 13, 2016

Musical Sunday


Beloved singer/songwriter Leonard Cohen passed away this past week, leaving a huge void in the world of music. I have many "favorite" Leonard Cohen songs, but this one - which has been covered by hundreds of artists - is probably my favorite favorite ...



And this one is my runner-up ...



Good by, Leonard. We'll miss you.

Have a good day. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo


Saturday, November 12, 2016

Cartoon Saturday


Did anyone get the number of the truck that just ran us down?

In an upset unexpected by many, Donald Trump won the 2016 presidential election on Electoral College votes, even though Hillary Clinton narrowly beat him in the popular vote; in the wake of the Trump victory, interest in secession from the United States is growing in California; two Marine Corps jet fighters collided in midair near San Diego, and one aircraft was lost although both pilots were rescued; influential Candian singer/songwriter Leonard Cohen, whose classic song "Hallelujah" has been recorded by hundreds of artists, died at the age of 82; and in the town of Canonsburg near Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, one police officer was killed and another wounded when they responded to a report of a domestic dispute.

As part of my continuing effort to help us take our minds off the results of the election and the vast outpouring of either (depending on your political persuasion) smug gloating or miserable acquiescence, here are some utterly apolitical cartoons concerning art ...

How painters seek inspiration in the year 2016 ...


If art museums had truly meaningful names for their galleries ...


For those who get high on art ...


A classic ...


Speaking of appropriate names for galleries ...


Who just takes a picture any more, eh? ...


Everybody's got to start someplace ...


Where can I get one of those mirrors? ...


A little miscommunication here ...


Some people just don't understand the old ways ...


And there you have it - your first post-election collection of cartoons to keep you smiling as you adjust to the New World Order. Some of us are deleriously happy, others are bitterly sad, and I suspect that many of the former will - before long - turn into the latter. We'll see.

It's going to be a very cold fall weekend here in NoVa, good for sitting in front of the fire under a pile of Agnes's handmade quilts with a cup of coffee and a good book. And maybe for doing a few chores as well. At least the low temperatures and lack of rain or snow will be good for my daily power walk.

Have a good day and a great weekend. More thoughts tomorrow.

Bilbo

Friday, November 11, 2016

Great Moments in Editing and Signage


Yes, Dear Readers, it's time to take your mind off the election results by having a good laugh courtesy of November's first collection of Great Moments in Editing and Signage. You're welcome.

I don't think I can argue with this one, grammar notwithstanding ...


Hmmm ... do I want the Steamed Serpent Head or the Broken Sea Lampshade? ...


Ms French Fries, please, and Mr Mayonnaise to go with her ...


Special offer for all those people getting ready for the apocalypse ...


I think I can find dates more easily than this ...


Okaaaaay ...


I wish I'd seen these people before we spent all that money on the remodeling ...


Looks aren't important, but ...


No comment ...


For those of you who are history buffs, this is really funny ...


And there you have it: your first editorial and signage gems for the month ... just a reminder that there are still things we can laugh about.

And speaking of laughter, be sure to come back tomorrow for Cartoon Saturday ... more thoughts then.

Bilbo